A Letter

I feel like a deflated balloon.
Maybe everyone does. It's July 17 and I'm just pasively waiting for time to pass, until the most eventful time of my life comes around and I'll go back to wishing that I had just stayed like this. You're too predictable, me. So now I'm coding. Just, barely scratching the surface of the actual basics of html because I've always wanted to make my own website. This isn't really one... Maybe I could just say it's a blog. In fact, I only named it a letter to sound pretty. I love the concept of letters. Conveying something to another person, without them interrupting. Maybe that's a bit of a reflection of what I'd wish I could do-- To not be misunderstood, to lay out all my feelings in one piece of paper and just hope it comes across. I can clean up my mistakes. I can touch up how I write it. No pressure. No pain. Just the pen and me, working together to carve what I truly feel-- in which, I've never done. Whatever sounds right, whatever satisfies me whatever would satisfy them, that's all I put. No sincerity. Just another grain into the pile of rice in my bowl, the bowl with boldly painted letters on the front: "PEOPLE PLEASER".